san francisco has the lofty ideal held by the intelligentsia across the country that this is a bastion of philosophical, intellectual, and progressive thought. Any transgression by our government that impinges on our democracy and its ideals will surely be addressed by this city's engaged and informed activists, right? Wrong. I have come to realize that there really is nothing going on in this city as far as socio-political consciousness. If you take time to search for political groups, book discussions, current events forums and meetings, lectures, and other intellectual meetings, you'll find the usual distractions and indulgences that you'd find in any other city. Their are plenty of groups and activities centered around small businesses, investing, real estate, relationships, gaming, movies, and all of the other subjects which basically have the common category of diversion. We have large expos on how to become wealthy in our convention centers. Starbucks is filled with people all trying to further their careers, get their next degree, and mostly - engaging in IT. Yes IT that ubuiquitous social medium which exemplifies consumerism to its highest potential. People salivate over the next gadget, the next accessory, and then put it to use in one of their 300 text messages or e-mails throughout their self edifying social network with purposes of maintaining their poplularity and connectedness which satiates their self appraisal of worth and belonging. They feel compelled to know the latest on Paris, Lindsey, and Britney and then strive to know the real Brad Pitt and David Beckham. Show after show after show contrived by the corporate owned media networks serve our whetted appetite for sex, drama, conflict, and illustrations of what image is desirable and in need of emulation. Meanwhile we are no longer living in a democracy. A democracy is a government for the people by the people and every man is created equal. This government does not represent in any way shape or form what the people want and as we sit distracted, the greatest diffusion of wealth to a burgeoning aristocracy is happening before our very eyes. Yes, one would look to San Francisco for help - but no, not any longer. The 1500 dollar rents and million dollar homes have pushed all enlightenment to the periphery. Now we wake up on a day to day basis and simply battle for self accumulation and comfort and equate liberty and freedom with the ability to consume the latest material du jour. right now i-pod, something else next month. We are a nation of addicts and San Francisco is probably one of the shining monuments to this age of ignorance and philistinism. There's no progressivism going on here..the only thing this city is progressing towards is cosmopolitan plutocracy. (anonymous, july 26, 2007)

To slow down was advice I was given recently by the Injury Clinic Dr - to stop multi-tasking. Returned from Ireland to return to the job after the weekend and just like before I went on the trip just too much to do. Maybe mom told you, before coming here to work I was on a roll running in every direction getting this and that done and quite pleased with myself (like there was no tomorrow) when I tumbled over a full laundry basket. I was on my way out with plastic bags to drop off at the supermarket for recycling after work, turn off the washer before I left as I felt I overloaded and carrying too much which blinded the basket at the bottom of the stairs. I was carrying also a hot travelling mug w/tea which spilled all over and more on my left hand. When I tumbled my face banged on a hard surface. I instantly looked like someone beat the hell out of me. Whatever about my face, I couldn't understand why my hand was so sore never thinking I burned it. I went off to Kaiser to the Injury Clinic and got the same doctor I saw last year when I broke my ankle in June and fell out of the raft in Tahoe (remember when mom came with us). Doctor wanted to know who beat and burned me. Don't know if she ever believed the truth. I just so happened to have a retirement appt. that same afternoon and I went to it. I got a ticket from a cop on my way to West Portal for not stopping at a stop sign. Not a good day! Guess I told you all that because we do tend to stress ourselves out and it's not a good thing. I too have high blood pressure/cholesteral and take medicines for both. I exercise and eat right - must be in the genes. Mom is a worry but we have to take care of ourselves also. Went to Holy Cross with her on Saturday and it's just not easy with her. The hearing aids she has should have been returned long ago and just to move her from A to Z is difficult. Mom was a very healthy lady until she was 80. You should never feel, John, that you need to spend as much time w/her as you do if it stresses you. Perhaps quality time rather than quantity. You have been so good but an hour's visit is okay too - don't feel you need to spend the Saturday night and Sundays also. You work all week and the weekend is all you have. I know my weekends are so precious. Do you take medicine for the blood pressure and cholesteral? I was going to go to Camp Mather w/Sheila and Angela for four days in August. Senior citizen four days - believe it or not I qualify having just turned 55. Kind of sad. Working for the school district, it's the week school resumes. I've been waiting for my bosses okay and she just told me I cannot have the days off. Guess I need to retire when I can. (email from mary to john, july 25, 2007)

I just got back from the River today and checked my emails and was glad to hear from you since Mary called me last night about your situation. I know mom tried your house today but I called her and told her you went to work. Why did you go to work today? You should of stayed home. What did Kaiser tell you? Did they give you any medicine to relieve the anxiety attacks. John, it seems to me you should rent a cabin out in the country and get some good books and just take care of yourself. I know that mom is always a constant worry in the back of our heads. It's always there - I know that and I also know it is affecting us all. Why did Sheila break down in tears at work? Why is Mary falling down the stairs? Why is Kathy afraid to call Mom and calls me to see how mom is? I do want you to know this. Though you think Mary is hard I know she called Kaiser several times last night asking about you and also this morning. She felt you had no family there and shouldn't be alone. (email from angela to john, july 24, 2007)